This is a post of two extremes. To start with, I have to rant and rave about published books that include spelling or grammar errors. I hate that. I really hate that. This week I’ve been reading two books that were both self-published – one a novel, one a non-fiction book – and both are riddled with errors. I’m not talking just the odd missing apostrophe or one or two misspelt words, but the kind of errors that would leave the pages obliterated in red ink if I was doing an editing job on them.

I know some people who’ve read the same novel, and the errors didn’t bother them. It’s possible I’m a bit over-the-top about spelling and grammar, a combination of working as a proofreader and editor in the past, and being an English teacher and writer now. I admit that I’m a tough judge. But it’s a BOOK! If we’re not going to have correct punctuation, spelling and grammar in a book, where will we? (Having said that, I read just two articles in The West Australian newspaper this morning and found two errors there, too). I’ll groan over a missing apostrophe in an email but I can live with it. If you’re going to go to all the trouble of publishing a book, is it not too much to expect that finding a decent proofreader is something that is fairly obligatory?

Now, before you take a magnifying glass to this blog and point out all my errors, I apologise in advance. Nobody’s perfect, but I think my spelling, grammar and punctuation are above average. I even know the difference between “its” and “it’s”. My spelling might vary between American and British usage – I do confuse them now since I write for both markets – but it’s more or less correct.

So here’s the other extreme of this post, and it’s all about spelling. The other week I caught the end of a “grand final” show of some Aussie TV programme which followed a spelling contest for Australian primary school children. I think the kids were between 10 and 12 years old and they’d worked their way through several rounds to get to the final, spelling a lot of tricky words in the process, I guess. But none so tricky as some from the grand final, which I absolutely admit I couldn’t have got correct, like these:

• stanchion
• bougainvillea (at least I know what this one means, but I’d have only a 50-50 chance of getting the spelling right)
• syzygy (I think. Even my spell check doesn’t know this one).
• staphylococcus (a ten-year-old boy spelled this correctly. Wow!)

When these kids self-publish their books, I’ll probably be able to read them without grimacing.

I feel better for getting this out of my system. I know I’m in a minority of society, the people-who-get-aggressive-about-wrong-apostrophes group, but am I alone? Please let me know in the comments if you’re a spelling monster like me or if you can ignore all the mistakes and just read what a writer is trying to say.